Three Girls, Two Mums, One Beautiful Story

For Lesbian Visibility Week, Alison and Sandra share their story… From the birth of their first daughter to the unexpected arrival of identical twins, and the journey of building a family rooted in love, openness, and belonging.

Hi, we’re Alison and Sandra. We have been married 13 years and are lesbian parents to our three gorgeous girls: Elizabeth (7), Alex (6) and Cate (6, identical twins).

We had both always wanted children and were really fortunate that one of our friends was happy to be a donor. Sandra gave birth to Elizabeth in early 2019. We decided to try to conceive again quite soon after, thinking it would be fine to have two close together, but hadn’t accounted for Alison becoming pregnant at the first attempt… with identical twins!

Apparently every woman has a 1 in 250 chance of conceiving identical twins, and we happened to win the genetic lottery! So whilst having three kids in a year was always going to be challenging, we hadn’t factored in a global pandemic the following year, so it’s fair to say 2020 was pretty tough. Having expected to receive lots of support, we ended up with very little. Thankfully we avoided any home schooling, and so are grateful for that at least!

Alison is an adoption support worker and so we’ve always felt strongly about the importance of our children having a clear sense of identity and understanding about where they came from. We have been very honest with our girls about their background, which has been really positive. They know two women can’t have a baby, so we needed some help.

They are very inquisitive about anything and everything, so naturally sometimes ask questions such as why they have two mums and why most people marry people of the opposite sex. We acknowledge that it is less usual, but that difference is positive. We give the example that most people are right-handed, but like the girls, a few are also left-handed, and that’s okay!

Our local town isn’t particularly diverse, so visibility is really important to us. Proud to be Parents has been vital in providing visibility for our girls and giving them the opportunity to meet and make friends with other children from LGBT+ families. We love attending the meet-ups and have also made some really good friends through the group too.

More than anything, this journey has reinforced how important visibility, honesty, and community are — not just for us, but for our children as they grow up in the world.